Your wedding can be one of the most exciting and important days of your life. Not only is it a time when all of your loved ones gather to celebrate the love of you and your soon-to-be spouse, it is also the opportunity for you to make your explicit promises and commitments to the person you are marrying. During a wedding, the exchange of vows is one of the most meaningful and significant parts, and wedding vows can look incredibly different from ceremony to ceremony: some people deliver pre-written promises written by a religious leader, while others give completely personalized pledges that they wrote to match the personality of their partner or the theme of the event.
If you have a wedding coming up and you want to make sure your vows are specific, personalized, and tailored, one of the best ways to do that is to write them yourself. If you’re not sure where to start writing your vows, the following guide may help. Keep these tips in mind while you write, and you’ll end up with a ceremony that is uniquely tailored to you and perfectly fitting for your relationship.
One of the most important tips to writing your own wedding vows is not leaving it to the last minute. You don’t want to be scrambling to write your vows the day before (or even the morning of!) Especially because wedding events can get hectic and stressful as relatives and event staff actually arrive. Start writing a draft of your vows several weeks before your wedding, then refine as it gets closer. If you’d like, you can let a trusted friend, relative, or mentor read the vows to see if they think they’re ready to be read at the wedding. If you get nervous speaking in front of other people, you can also find a person to practice the vows in front of so you can feel smooth reading or reciting them on the day of.
Make it Personal
Think about personal stories or moments that have felt pivotal leading up to the wedding. Think about the moments you met, or the ones when you knew you wanted to spend your life with this person. Consider telling these short anecdotes at the start of the vows to illustrate to your partner and everyone in attendance how your relationship and love developed to get to this point. Personal stories in vows also help attendees feel like they get to know you better, so they feel more intimate and involved in the love they are celebrating that day.
Talk about Thick and Thin
One of the key parts of wedding vows is committing to staying with the person you are marrying through hard times and good times. This is the reason that traditional wedding vows mention “in sickness and in health” and “for richer or poorer.” While you don’t have to mention financial or physical wellness specifically, you may want to make clear that you are promising to stay in the relationship when things are happy and fruitful, and when things are harder and less so. Relationships and lives change as time passes, and one of the best parts about being married is that you have promised to stick by the side of a person despite these changes.
Make Other Important Promises
Are there special promises that you want to make in your marriage that are specifically tailored to your partner? The bulk of the vows should be about these promises. Think about things that are important to your partner or central to your relationship. List these promises–then include them all or narrow them down to the most important. You can make promises that feel light, funny, and personal, like promising to get your partner coffee in bed on weekday mornings, or promising to walk the dog when it’s raining because your partner hates to do it.
Consider Incorporating Literature or Poetry You Like
There are many pieces of art that address love and marriage. If you are a literary person or you know of a written piece that encapsulates your feeling about your partner, consider incorporating it into your vows. You can explain why you’ve chosen to read an excerpt or a quote, or say that the author was able to say it better than you can. Sometimes, choosing a professionally written piece can help you say exactly what you want to say in beautiful, elegant, poetic words.
Get on the Same Page as Your Partner
If you are both writing your wedding vows for the wedding, make sure both people are on the same page about what is being written and delivered. You don’t want to write vows that are two pages long, while your partner has only prepared two lines. Discuss general length and content. This way, while your vows will be completely different and personalized, they will feel fitting to the ceremony and equal in effort and thought. Also, if there are things that you want to ensure you both say during your vows (certain shared jokes, promises you both want to make, or religious phrases), you should make sure beforehand that you both know to put these into what you write.
Print a Clean and Clear Copy for the Ceremony
If you’ve written your vows by hand or practiced with a copy you have edited, make sure you type and print a clean and clear copy for the wedding. Make your vows double spaced and in large font so you can see if. You’ll be nervous (or crying!) when you are giving your vows, so you want to make it as easy as possible on yourself when it comes time to deliver and say your promises.
Ready for the Next Step in Planning? Contact Linen Hero
Once you have written your vows and you’re ready for the big day, the next step is planning the rest of the party. To ensure you have all the decor and accessories you need for the event, reach out to Linen Hero. Linen Hero is one of the leading suppliers of linens, chair covers, table cloths, and more. We can talk to you about those exact feelings and themes you were thinking about when you wrote your vows, then ensure that they come through clearly in the elements you choose to decorate your venue.